boring

REJECTION REJECTION REJECTION REJECTION REJECTION.

Now that’s out of the way.
I feel I should discuss people that act in an obviously one-sided manner, and then apparently mean something completely different… fuck.

this is pretty much all i have been living off for the last few days, since friday…. i do love it though. odd. not many people like the taste. i think it’s misunderstood.like dr. pepper.. Ewan described is as “cream soda for fruit”. nice.

i’ve been on my own since friday too nobody seems to be in. although i’m sure they must be ,it’s a bit odd. ah well. i keep getting these really nasty headaches for about ten seconds then they go again… it’s been happening for a while now. maybe i should start eating some healthy food rather than i diet of pizza, irn bru, vodka and …….

i havn’t wrote to this blog in about 4 days or there about.. my bad. everything i start i seem to lose track off, or just give up because i can’t be bothered. i’ll make the effort this time…

Lying in bed, alone and struck with a headache, always back here again.. this is what I get for mistreating my body so much.

A horrible habit I have is my need to be alone, and yet have loving company with me all the time.
As soon as I feel a panic attack coming on I run to a corner (metaphorically speaking) where I know I can get the attention that i want. It’s horrible, i’m a bad person…. I only want people when I can’t handle or deal with myself… But as it turns out, that’s all the time.. like right now.
It’s almost like I like being on my own so i can long for someone? A contradiction I am aware…

Being really open but yet always hidden, it applies to everything.
This blog for example… it’s there, everyone can read it if they choose, but i’m still not writing exactly what I want. I’m telling the truth adn expressing how I feel, but I want to write down exactly everything, But common sense keeps telling me that\s not a very good idea.

The music, I want everyone to hear it, but I also don’t really want anyone to hear it.

writing this did take my mind of how intense my headache is right now. But as I write this I am now fully aware again. Maybe I was exposed to some form of radiation.
Or maybe there’s a leak.. and everyone in this building is going to die.
No one would even know…. I could see this happening

revision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,

revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsion,

revision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,

revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsion,

revision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsion

revision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsion

revision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsion

revision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsionrevision,revsion

i might go and eat…

i think what i did today could be classed as stalking….

i’m not really sure, but more on that issue later.

i went to visit one of my friends today, who’s just got a job at sainsburys’ problem is I arrived a bit late and he’d already gone, story of my life. I should prbably get a job, everyone else seems to have one at the moment, it’s just a trend, it’ll pass.

Right, would you consider this to be stalking; I caught two buses and ran for quite a while (which is something i don’t normally do) just to seee someone that i’m to much of a prick to talk to any way. But we did talk, and i was happy. Actually that doesn’t sound that bad does it???

and the plus, the first track is almost completed, just vocals now needed.