i feel ashamed of this blog, i never update, i’ve let it run into a state of desolation. the amount of times i’ve apologised for this is overwhelming… enough though. i’ll try and do better. i have had this blog for quite a while now though, over two years i think. i could check but i don’t really think it matters that much.
first off, congrats to amy who got into not only camp america but also study abroad. very proud i am. i always knew she would though, i know everybody says that about things, and i guess you can never be sure of things until they happen, but there was just no way she wasn’t going to get it. she wanted them so bad, and put in the effort, and got them. i like that… i am truly happy for her though. she’ll have an amazing time out there in north carolina.
the other night i watched the film taxi driver, i was actually amazed by it. i don’t really know what though, i can’t put my finger on it but i couldn’t really speak for a while after. weird. this sums it up “Overall an impressive and morally depressing film that deserves its place in cinematic history. The portrayal of a city and a man slipping into moral insanity is convincing and engaging and it shows how well to “do” modern madness and the effects of the moral void of parts of society. Scorsese directs as a master despite this being at an early stage in his career and De Niro is chillingly effective as he simply dominates the film in quiet moments and quotable moments alike”
i can’t sleep again. i am tired though. i’ve rather neglected this blog i’m ashamed to say, i have been up to some stuff though, i’ve been to crete with amy which is where the second photo was taken, how perfect does she look? very i’m sure you’ll agree. i’m too lucky.
i apologise if this post doesn’t really make much sense, i’m so tired, just when i thought i was starting to get somewhere with getting to sleep it all falls apart. i don’t get it. there was a point when it was only taking me like half an hour to get to sleep. oh well. i’m sure i’ll be fine. i’ve moved back home by the way, only for the summer though, hopefully i’ll be back off to stirling in september. i hope.
i’m feeling pretty crap right now, not emotionally, but i think i’m coming down with something. probably only a 24 hr thing, i just feel a bit under the weather, not sleeping probably has something to do with it. Definitely not swine flu though, man flu maybe. i’ve just decided that tomorrow when i wake up i’m going to have to start making this damn cd i’ve been thinking about making. i’ve been thinking about doing it for like a month now, that’s how i am though. i think and think about doig something but it takes me forever to get around to doing it. that’s another reason why i’m lucky to have amy, she pushes me to get things done, not in a (for lack of a better word) ”pushy” way though, more of a nudge i guess, but it’s enough. anyway, i’ve decided all on my own to do this tomorrow, even if it has taken me a month to get to this point. i’m a nightmare.
i should try and get to sleep again, i know for a fact that it’s going to take at least two hours though… i’m off up to aberdeen in two days. i’m really looking forward to it, i love being up there, it’ll also be good to get away from guildford for a bit, i haven’t been back long and i’m already sick of the place.
sleep well
peacex.
i’m having trouble sleeping again, it’s not that i keep waking up during the night though. once i’m asleep i’m fine until the morning, it’s just getting to sleep… it’s taking me 3 hours. i don’t thik that’s normal. It might be. i don’t really know. perhaps i should look it up on the internet… House wouldn’t be too impressed, that’s for sure, he’d probably tell me to do more exercise or something stupid. what?!1? Everything seemed to fudge itself up a couple of weeks ago, and it’s still not sorted, but that is my fault. i need to make decisions, but i’m just rubbish at that. It’s not like i don’t know what i want though. i know exactly what i want to do, yet fro some reason it’s really troubling me. Maybe it’s because… i don’t know why…. well actually i have a few ideas why, but when i think about them properly they just seem silly and pointless and i don’t come any closer knowing why. is this making sense? i doubt it…. nothing is making sense. Then there’s this thing with my job, or lack there of. i’m owed a months wages, and as of yet i haven’t seen any of it. sort of. i did have the money for the best part of one morning. then it got taken away from me although apparently they were “unable to do that”. It’s just fucking added stress. To be honest i know i don’t have much to complain about, i mean things could be so much worse, i know that, it’s just it’s a big decision to make. Well it is now anyway. silly really when you think about, i have my whole life ahead of me and yet i feel i need to rush into this now, maybe it’s because everybody else is and it seems like the right thing to do. stupid way of thinking.
i’m not really sure if i want to post this entry….
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If anybody wants to buy me a cafetiere it would much appreciated, i’m fed up of instant coffee.
how amazing is this…
peace x.
